The Life of an Ongoing Third Wheel

I can’t complain.

I get to wake up everyday and get to do the things I want, when I want. I don’t have to answer to anyone, except for my mother…she can be persistent.

But, since I’m always single I find myself as the third wheel, quite frequently.

Especially, if your best friend is in a relationship. I’m pretty much married to my best friend. I listen to her problems, she listens to mine. She cries, I cry. She laughs, I laugh. You get the picture.

Now, I have thought about charging my friends a fee because I swear I’m their personal relationship advisor or psychiatrist. I have never minded listening to their problems, giving advice, or sharing my opinion.

I just think I should put it to good use. Maybe if I write a book, I can just give them all a copy and save their time from endless bullshit.

As a third wheel, you go through five phases in my experience.

The first phase is, “I feel really bad for her, he’s such an ass.”

The second phase is, “I have told you many times you deserve better.”

The third phase is, “Why am I even opening my mouth?”

The fourth phase is, “I’m tired of listening to your problems. It makes me realize I am involved in a relationship but without the good parts.”

The fifth phases is, “I will beat that asshole for you!”

I’m not saying the phases come in that order but eventually if you are a third wheel you will experience them all at some point.

I will always be there for my friends. I will always continue to give advice. I will always continue to help a friend kick a boy to the curb because I’m a great third wheel like that.


Cassidy, a fellow third wheeler.

Image sourced from Pinterest.


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